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Musings

That Birthday Feeling

It is Sunday, March 18th while I write this and I am still 45. In 2 days I will be 46. Well tecnhically, in 34 1/2 hours I will be 46.

I’m not excited at all…;) 

As far back as I can remember (which is getting worse in my old age here), my Birthday always concocted imagery of spring because it is the first day of spring: March 20th. The day also, depending on calendar creators, coincides very closely with Easter. So, I pretty much grew up loving everything about spring, it’s newness, it’s colors (pinks, fresh greens, purples), and the birth of baby farm animals like chicks, pigs, and horses (I was raised on a small farm just outside of Edmonton, Alberta, Canada). Spring meant rebirth and there was always a happy time associated with it.

Being raised in Alberta meant the first day of spring, weather-wise, would be one of two things: The sun would be hot, high in the sky and melting all the snow (in which case we would wear shorts, yes! shorts!), or it would be blizzarding out (like it is today), reminding us of the old saying, ‘In like a Lamb, out like a Lion’ (I always did like it when it was the other way around…blizzards and birthdays don’t mix). 

Today, none of that matters to me anymore really. I am happy to look outside knowing that even though there are flakes falling the size of Manhattan at  a rapid pace, it will all be gone within a month. I will be walking around my lake just outside my home once again watching as the Canadian Geese fly back to their familiar waters, seeing their babies waddling after their parents. I will be welcoming the first fresh, bright green buds on the trees come mid-May and the blossoms of the apple trees in my familiar walking trails. I will be able to sit in the dark, forested, alley way in the acreages near my home in complete stillness while I hear nature and life all around me. I will smell the lovely clover sprouting up around my pretty lake, fragrant with promise of warm days ahead.

Each year on my Birthday, my Mother used to always make me special cakes. I was (and still am!) a girly girl so she would concoct some pretty awesome one-of-a-kind confectioneries like a Barbie cake (much like the one you see below), or if my Birthday was close to Easter, it would be a bunny cake or cakes (like you see below).

I loved waking up to see her put the finishing touches on my cake (or cakes). I say cakes, plural, because some years, she would make THREE of the humpback bunny cakes with Pink, Purple, and Yellow coconut ‘fur’ on them. It was awesome! I also loved waiting in anticipation as each one of my friends arrived to celebrate my special day with me too. (except for that one year when my mother counted 75 pairs of shoes in our front foyer! LOL – word got out fast that year. I was 16, of course it was going to be a Birthday bash to remember!). And then there was that one year my cake was mashed after an epic food fight……

Birthdays in our home were always very special events. My siblings and I were always spoiled on our special day too. My parents did what they could too and they always did great. My favorite gifts one year were the Strawberry Shortcake doll collection I had really wanted and another year, it was a new bike. We weren’t a wealthy family, certainly not poor either, but we weren’t that family to have the first computer in our house either (which, in the late 80’s and early 90’s was a big deal) so whatever my parents did, was just perfect by me. I know this sounds cliche, but the gifts didn’t really matter to me either, it only mattered that the people in my life showed up for my big day to celebrate with me: My Godmother, Kim, My Grandparents, certain Aunts and Uncles….I even share a birthday with my Uncle and Godfather, Greg Michetti too! (Happy Birthday Uncle G!). Birthday’s were celebrated well in our home with family and friends. We always had a great time! As I got older, and my siblings and I began having children of our own, the importance of our birthdays were still great, but it became more important to make our children’s special day just as memorable as ours were growing up. 

This last month while preparing for the Birthday Podcast on ‘The Candice Anne Marshall Show‘, I did a lot of reflecting on my life. At first, I began to obsess about all the things I ‘hadn’t’ done in the last 10 years since my moms’ passing like my book not being finished, the weight I want to lose, the 1957 convertible I always wanted (two-tone in cream and white please!), living in a new country with the love of my life, and a dog named ‘Shumu’….you know, the normal stuff (smiles). And by the way, I keep asking for that unicorn and Go Go’s reunion and that hasn’t happened yet either! I guess I’ll file it away with that trinket from Tiffany’s I always wanted too…;) 

During the process of thinking about the things I hadn’t done, I realized exactly what I have done in this last 365 day run-around-the-sun-marathon of my life and I discovered that I have achieved much more than I could possibly imagine:

I launched a series of celebrity interviews via Starlight Music Chronicles Spotlight which show no signs of stopping anytime soon. I began a one-hour weekly short-run radio show on Limehead Radio in the UK and simultaneously launched my very own podcast radio show with my biggest Celebrity interviews of the year with both Golden Globe winners (for Franco Zeffirelli’s 1968 version of Romeo and Juliet) Olivia Hussey and Leonard Whiting. I was lucky to have made some fabulous new friendships from this too (thank you Ciro!) I followed this with an awesome show featuring the lovely Mike Gandolfi (best known as our favorite Gilmore Girls ‘townie’ Andrew), then continued on with a compelling interview with my dear friends Doug Buckingham (Past Life Regression Therapist) and Sidney Wood (Author). I also introduced indie music to my podcast too featuring all of my ‘Starlight Music Chronicles Family’ peeps. My industry friends and I helped a local Edmonton family through the Christmas season after the sudden loss of their son with The Luke Jansen Memorial fund (www.lukejansen.ca) by bringing awareness to the music community that this wonderful mentorship fund has been created by his family to honor their son and brother. I continued to support and do projects with my industry peers via interviews and introductions for future projects. I have picked up my pen to write 7 more chapters of my autobiography ‘The Dreaming Heart‘ (hopefully I will have it done this year folks!), and I have networked and taught a mentorship course to my favorite industry peers as my way to help them enhance their own promotions on social media. I have had some very lovely people come into my life, and I have had to say goodbye (in some cases, very suddenly) to others, but that’s the ebb and flow life and I have since, learned to accept it. This wasn’t a list of accomplishments shared as a brag book, it was shared because I literally had to write this all down to physically see exactly what I have been doing this past year and be a little less harsh on myself for any ‘lack’ of accomplishments. I think we all should do this from time to time…

So here’s my advice to any of you who are turning another calendar year older shortly like I am:

Life may not always pleasant with rainbows and butterflies, but we most certainly can make the best of it by putting out our BEST intentions, hopes, and dreams to the universe. Sometimes we have to wait for them to come back to us, but they always do come back to us in the most surprising of ways. I never imagined that I would find the people, events, and things I did this past year, but I did and for that, I am truly grateful to life and the universe for answering me back. I always say that I don’t have a lot, but I have everything I need and that is: the love and support from the people closest to me and I always know I can rely on you when I need you. You have all really helped me grow this past year and see and do things I never thought possible. This alone is a reason to celebrate! 

I hope you will all join me on Tuesday, March 20th, while I go live and spin some of my favorite Musicians, and chat with a couple of very cool surprise guests! All the event details and showtimes globally can be found here. Be sure you have subscribed to my podcast so that you will be notified when I go live and you can talk with me in the chat room! I will be playing some beautiful birthday messages on this show that have been sent to me along with answering questions by all of you lovely friends and family! It’s going to be a rocker! 

One last thing:

I know I always talk about putting your best out to the universe and staying positive, etc. But – here’s proof (see photo below). You see, when I turned 10 years old, I saw the movie Annie (the original with Aileen Quinn as Annie) and in it, she received a silver locket for her birthday. I always loved that film and the celebration of her birthday in it. For personal reasons I can’t discuss (which will be revealed in my book), let’s just say that the universe brought many of my wishes to me this past week. One of them, in the form of this beautiful locket sent to me by someone very special. It is an almost identical heart-shaped locket like the one Annie received on her birthday…now how lovely is that? Thank you Z. xo

Thank you all for your lovely messages coming already in emails, facebook, twitter, and Instagram. I feel very loved and appreciated and my wish this year is that all of you received that same love right back from me, too. Look to the stars, wish on a rainbow (they are my favorite), and don’t ever give up on your dreams.  I sure haven’t! They may come slow, but be patient. They will come. 

Tuesday will come, and there may not be a Go Go’s reunion or a unicorn waiting for me, but I have something even better than that, I have you (yes, if you are reading this, then this means you). So, here we go 46! Let’s smile at the sun, sing beneath the stars, play in the snow, and dance in the rain again. I don’t FEEL my calendar age, I feel young, and alive, and full of joy! I am loved, and life just doesn’t get any better than that! I don’t know how long I have left, but I plan on making the rest of my life, the best of my life with the best people in it. 

Now, Let’s bring on that Birthday feeling and PARTY! See you all on Tuesday! 

Candice Anne Marshall x

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